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Sunday, January 23, 2011

Battle of the bulge...

Diets, nutrition, exercise, etc have a place in my heart. (note: I did not say special place) I was ALWAYS the fat girl growing up. Always. I was always the girl who got the "oh but you have such a pretty face" compliment. I was always the girl that got the "FAT" insult when having an argument with one of my girlfriends... And it hurt. Like, A LOT. I wish I could put into words what that three letter word does (did?) to me; but I can't. Although my friends growing up would always try and counteract my "baby fat" with the fact that I had a very large chest (talkin' like 38DD -- and I would still be falling out of my bras); it almost made it worse. I not only was the fat girl, but I had these HUGE boobs that were awful on my back (what's up scoliosis) and got the wrong kind of attention. Attention I DID NOT WANT. Especially at that time in my life...

Unfortunately, one day I kind of just lost it. I was nearing almost 200 pounds and on my 5'4 frame and my doctor told me that I needed to lose weight. That day I told myself that I was not going to be the fat girl ANYMORE

Now of course, I would love to sit here and say that I lost all of my weight the "right" way... but I didn't. I tried every diet out there. Atkins, Weight Watchers, Special K, restriction ... you name it, I probably tried it. (more on this later...)

Then, I got the most boring job in the world and was introduced to the FOOD BLOG NATION as I call it. Daily, I would read Kath Jenna, Mama Pea , Meghann, CaitlinThe fitnessista! and Tina and each day I would learn more and more. Although I had an interest in health and nutrition prior to these ladies' blogs (I always considered nursing, but honestly, I just do not think I could handle it) my passion for the field has grown more and more each day. 

Fast forward approx. 2 years --- That most boring job in the world finally got the best of me.  It was literally making me sick, and I was more and more miserable each day I had to sit at that desk with no work to do, and just sit there ... and sit there. For seven hours. No work to be done (Most people would love to get paid to be bored and Google and Facebook all day; but not me. I like being busy, and I like the time to fly by!!!) I just couldn't. It was mentally and emotionally killing me. So, I talked it over with my significant other (we are going to call him TFK, for his work and privacy purposes) and he was so relieved. He saw me deteriorate more and more each day, and was all for me leaving work and finishing my degree. 
(Have I mentioned that I have the most supportive, caring, and loving man in the world? Don't worry, a whole post about our "crazy" life is coming soon...)
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Currently, my major is Psychology, my other passion. After the two classes that I will finally get to finish come this September, I will have an associates and transfer to a four year school where I will have to actually make some decisions.. stay with psychology? Start over and become an R.D.? Join the circus? Regardless of what I choose to do, I need to follow my heart. And I guess that's really what matters ... right?

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